Back In The Diz-ay: Bike Riding The Shamokin Train Tracks…Armed

When I was about 13 years old, the Shamokin/Coal Township region was a relatively safe area to go for a stroll or bike ride alone. As the years passed, at age 19, I felt that bike riding by myself coincided with carrying a concealed hand gun for protection. WTF???

Was this paranoia setting in from all of the “supposed” recreational drug use from the past or did I have a valid reason to fear for my life? Was I just extremely excited to have passed the “bar” for sane people to carry guns with no restrictions?

How was this process from: a) purchasing a hand-gun to b) THEN getting a permit even plausible? I thought there was a “Brady Bill” which restricted people for five days from purchasing their gun(s). Obviously not, at least, not in MY neck of the woods. It made me the happiest non-red-neck in the world!

As I sojourned on my daily rides along the rail road tracks beginning at the fifth ward and continuing until Rt 61, I felt that MAYBE I should protect myself in some way. This thought only occurred after my first ride when I came across a few sanitation workers who seemed more interested in cat-calling and trying to jump the fence to get to me rather than working.

I also felt the same when middle-aged men in “beater” cars would pull next to me and pace me along the dirt path while questioning my stamina.

“I Gotta Deuce Deuce In The Trunk Of My Car”

There was no doubt in my mind then — I MUST pack my .22 in my bicycle handle-bar “sac”, OR it could be “lights-out” for myself AND my Schwinn.

I began to feel a new sense of freedom. The sun always seemed to be shining, it was always perfect temperature, there were always birds singing and there was ALWAYS a cold plastic bottle of water attached to my bike during my “freedom” rides. What could go wrong?

Did I mention that, as a rule, I kept my gun unloaded or locked. I just felt a little safer by having it with me, if only even to frighten someone, should the need arise.

On the occasions when I DID go shooting (mountains parties, barrels, swimming, A.T.V.’s and guns, ALWAYS a great combo, but I digress…) I would keep the safety on until the moment before using the weapon. Well….

And The Story Goes…

So I was cruising along my regular route at my average speed of about 10 to 15 MPH when I hit a major hole next to a railroad tie that had become dislodged from a week of inclement weather. Not only did I go head first over the handle bars, but also my “sac” containing my gun went flying.

I should mention that on impact the safety switch was apparently knocked into the ready position whilst slamming into a large rock. After the sac/gun hit the rock it continued to spiral against an abandoned fork-lift type vehicle and fired through the sac (I also APPARENTLY forgot to take the magazine out. Oops).

I did not know it was possible to have a minor coronary at age nineteen within a 10 second period. I know sport a tiny scar on my right temple where hair will never grow. No biggie. Thank god my parents never found out.

Oh, shit, I guess they just did. “Sorry M & D! Love you!

By the way, did you guys ever find out where I put my (licensed & registered) gun? I can’t seem to remember! Just give me a holler when you find it. Thanks!”