May 23, 2009
Third Patch Under State Control? WTF?
Recently, it has come to my attention that the “Third Patch” may be coming under state control. Apparently, the state wants to fill up all of the pot holes (perhaps pave the road), fill the sink holes in the swim holes so that people don’t get sucked down into the abyss, AND charge a fee on top of everything.
What ever happened to the good old days when no one cared if they got a flat tire driving out the mountain through pot holes, got stuck in mud puddles on their way to shoot guns and then drink beer and start bonfires?
Myself, along with many local residents, find this potential “Third Patch Fee” (I coined the phrase, thank you) utterly ridiculous and down-right silly. I decided to interview “Willy,” who lives on Bear Valley Avenue, to see how exactly he felt about this possible outrage.
“I can’t believe what these there peoples think they’res doin’ to our land [sic],” said Willy. “Why can’t we’s just keep havin’ them there beer parties and shootin’ and stuff without havin’ the f*&^%ng state interfacin’ and such?”
Also featured along the merry road to the Third Patch, if you make a left over a dirt mound, is the Whaleback. The Whaleback is some type of geological rock formation which may have some sort of significance, but I’m not sure.
I just learned, however, that it’s a “sweet place to get s*%t-faced,” according to Willy.
The water surrounding the Whaleback is a curiously bright shade of aqua, which also makes it popular among the acid-dropping Shamokinites. The hue of the water has been referred to as “f*%#ing awesome” by Shana, a pregnant, single mother of six who lives on Raspberry Hill.
Tell us what you think! Please leave a comment below. We LOVE comments!
Written by: A.K.A.
Filed Under: Featured
Tags: coal region, shamokin pa, swimming holes, the mile, the whaleback, third patch
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J.J. Spook
June 26, 2009 at 3:57 pm
You have to look at the larger picture. Sure, it’s going to be a PITA for the locals, but look at the possible revenue a Pay-to-Play park will bring to the area.
For years I’ve been going out da mountain and I can honestly say I welcome this. This could put an end to everybody and their brother dumping their dirty diapers, lazy-boys, and refrigerators because they are to damn lazy to take it to the dump.
Don’t forget about the boost to all the local vendors. The more people coming in to town to visit the area, the more they will spend in our town.
I say bring it…..it’s been needed for a long time.
A.K.A.
June 28, 2009 at 7:16 pm
Dear Mr. Spook, you have opened a new world to me regarding this Third Patch debacle. If not for your insight I would have remained with my “Eyes Wide Shut,” so to speak. Please keep your introspectiveness coming!
Sincerely, A.K.A.
MR.INEEDA LUNGS
July 5, 2009 at 11:51 pm
YOU THIRD PATCH DWELLERS BEWARE YOUR MILE HAS BEEN DRAINED THE SWAMP POND IS NOW JUST A MUD HOLE EVERY CRACK AND CREVAS IN BURNSIDE IS BEING STUFFED LIKE A THANKSGIVING TURKEY WITH TOXIC FLY ASH ALL IN THE NAME OF RECLAIMATION THE ONLY THING LINED AROUND HERE ARE THE POLITICIANS AND THE COAL COMPANYS POCKETS.